The Chronicles of Edinburgh, Part XIII – Miss Maloney


My favorite teacher of all time for quite a while was my first grade teacher, Miss Maloney. She was 25 at the time, which I remember because she had us do a math problem to figure it out on her birthday. Something along the lines of “I am the value of two nickels, a dime, and five pennies” or “I am one fourth of a hundred.”

Although I’m not sure that first graders do fractions or divide.

Eh. It’s been a while since first grade, sue me.

Anyway. She was my favorite teacher of all time, mostly because she gave us hugs (or I gave her hugs, lol) and she had really great ways to get us to behave in class. One of her methods (or probably the school’s, when I think of it now) was giving us a penny at the end of the day for good behavior.

We each had a slot on her wall. We each started the day with a smiley face, which went down to an expressionless face :| after one instance of misbehavior, and then a straight up sad face :( after two. I was a goody two shoes, but I’m still embarrassed to say that I had to go up once in March and have her downgrade me to a :| in the middle of the afternoon because I wouldn’t quit talking while on the carpet.

You know, the reading carpet?

It made me sad.

It still makes me sad.

Anyway. At the end of each day, as long as we didn’t have a :( on our sheet, we got a penny. We put all the pennies into a little “piggy bank” at the front of the room (which was just a laminated pig with a tiny Ziploc bag stapled to his underbelly) at the end of each day. On Friday afternoons, she took out what seemed like endless streams of toys and bits and bobbles and we could buy whatever we wanted from how much we had saved up.

Well, (for those of you who know me: this won’t be a surprise) I never bought a single thing throughout the school year and at the end of the year I had pennies from every single day.

And this (below), this bendy yellow guy, cost $1.50. And I was the only one who could afford him.

I still have him somewhere. And no, for the record, I didn’t buy another one…it just seemed sacrilegious to spend whatever amount of money it was on something that took me an entire year to earn, you know? :)

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